On Saturday, May 30th, the French capital, alongside the global sports journalism community, collectively held its breath for the UEFA Champions League final. In a dramatic showdown, Paris Saint-Germain once again lifted the coveted trophy, securing a hard-fought victory over Arsenal (1-1, decided by a penalty shootout). Following this monumental event, renowned football enthusiast and comedian Julien Cazarre, during his popular program “Les Nuits du Cazarre enchaîné,” gave his fellow pundit Jean-Christophe Drouet free rein to humorously dissect the various blunders committed by the commentators tasked with covering this planet-stopping match.

The initial target of their sharp wit was a commentator from Ici Paris radio, who notably misidentified Kai Havertz, the German player who opened the scoring in the 6th minute, as Leandro Trossard, even comically referring to him as “Tossard.” Not to be outdone, commentators on RMC Sport (the very channel that hosts “Les Nuits du Cazarre enchaîné,” demonstrating their willingness to critique even their own colleagues) also mistakenly attributed the German’s goal to Declan Rice, an entirely different player known for his defensive midfield role. “Was the commentary box located in the stadium’s restrooms?” quipped Julien Cazarre, ever quick with a barb, regardless of whether it’s aimed at players or the professionals paid to describe their actions. Jean-Christophe Drouet concurred, suggesting the commentators “were clearly not present at the stadium.”

“They must have been watching the wrong fixture – perhaps Arsenal versus Ipswich in the League Cup,” Cazarre further jested. Drouet elaborated by highlighting another commentator who substituted the common French idiom “faire le dos rond” (to weather the storm) with the awkward “faire le gros dos.” The duo then meticulously tallied every instance of the phrase “contre-pied parfait” (perfect wrong-footing), a term now considered outdated in modern football commentary. A surprising number of broadcasters were caught making this linguistic faux pas, drawing the strict disapproval of the “Les Nuits du Cazarre enchaîné” hosts. Their next mission involves scrutinizing the upcoming World Cup, enlisting their audience to submit commentator blunders through their “Balance ton com’” initiative. It promises more uproarious amusement for Julien Cazarre and his team, though perhaps less so for the targeted journalists.